It has been my constant learning experience, that my greatest moments of creativity, or breakthroughs, always occurred when I was alone and still.

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I live in the Mumbai City, in a college where ‘Socializing’ is the ‘in thing’. We follow the herding instinct. We need company for everything. Even when we go to the washroom sometimes.” Chalo sat me chalte hein”, is the catch phrase. We eat in a group, play in a group, gossip in a group, and study in a group. We feel insecure without company. And if we find  a guy sitting  alone, or is happily walking by himself,  we suspect him to be a loner or a reject.

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No one wants to be a ‘social reject’, or the ‘isolated one’. Everyone seeks ‘Social acceptance’, and friendship. But how much of ‘Socializing’ is good for us? Where to draw the line between ‘Obsessive compulsive company seeking’ and ‘healthy socializing’?

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These were some questions I asked myself. I did some research and got to the root of this behavior. When we were early Neanderthals, before civilizations, homo sapiens lived as colonies in caves. We hunted as a pack. This meant increased efficiency. There was differentiation of roles. So when the women would sleep, some men would keep a watch against wild animals. It was slowly essential for our survival, especially during the ‘ice ages’.

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And by Darwin’s theory of ‘Survival of the fittest’, only those humans with the protective herding instinct made it through. These became the favored progenitors for the continuation of the human race. We inherited their fears and behaviors. It’s in our DNA, so to speak. Yes, its proven by the science of “epigenetics” that even belief systems and behavioral traits can be inherited.

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It was observed in an experiment, that when a person was not in a herd, “prostaglandins”, where released in the body in small levels. These are chemicals that cause inflammation actually. But now these alert the body that we need to make a behavioral change to adapt.  Whereas when in a group we feel safe and “endorphins” or happy hormones are released.

This was the scenario for a million years, until civilization came into existence. It took thousands of years to move from the stone age, to fire, then to the wheel. But the last growth spurt of human civilization has occurred in just 200 years. We have thrived with industrialization and leaps in the medical field. Technology and our thinking abilities have made us the most superior race in the planet (or so we claim).  Life expectancy of an average human has almost tripled since the cave man.

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There are no more threats of wild beasts devouring us at night. There is no pressure for scourging for food, as we have discovered agriculture. We now know that a human can survive and thrive perfectly without a compulsive need for being in a herd.

 

Yet our genes and ancient inherited beliefs thrive over the mere 200-year progress. So we need to intellectually analyze and adopt a better belief system.

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The greatest minds in history have always told that “A silent mind is the most effective one”. The golden poet of India ‘Rabindranath Tagore’, describes his wanderings into the forest, and his silent bond with nature whenever he came out with a new composition. Even William words worth, wrote his ‘Daffodils’ after he went into a silent trance upon witnessing nature’s beauty.

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Einstein came up with his path breaking theories of Relativity and the ‘mass energy equation’ when sitting alone in his chamber as his wife would yell at him for letting the tea go cold.  For ‘Buddhism’ to be born, ‘Siddhartha’ had to go into isolation for 12 years.

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Let’s introspect for a moment. When have our best ideas struck us? When we were chatting in a group, or when we were sitting alone watching the Sun set?  Do innovators and scientists come up with scintillating hypothesis while partying in a pub or while staring at their equations in a silent cubicle? Did the solutions to your problems stand before you when you were discussing them with a friend? Or did everything seem all right after a good night's sleep?

I am not against the beauty of human bonding or the art of socializing, but I deeply advocate the need for silent introspection.

 

Let’s ask ourselves how many hours of the day do I give myself the “me time”. No! that doesn’t include the time we spend on the phone texting someone. It’s a time when we can take a silent walk in the moon light, or read a book for delight. Draw something, or paint something, write a blog, or create a song. Because only in the depths of silence does the master strokes of creation actually happen.

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"When we talk, we repeat what we know. But when we listen we learn something new.”

“It’s safe to be alone now. Let’s not call it loneliness. Let’s celebrate it as ‘Solitude’, a moment of silence and stillness”.  Let’s get in touch with our inner selves and become creators, innovators and lateral thinkers.

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The trick is to go into isolation/silence, connect to your inner self or the supreme force and once we create something new, or discover and idea, or find a solution, then come back to the world or society and share it with mankind. This oscillation between introversion and extroversion makes life much more fruitful.

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- Seeker for life,